Blogging..who knew??

I love to blog...I love to talk about my kiddos...and my life...I love all the people that I have met and keep up with on a daily basis. I have learned so much from some of these people that are in reality complete strangers to me. I have seen kind, caring people with a love for the Lord, that some days has seem foreign to me! I have grown up in church all of my life...I have attended many many VBS, Gospel meetings, and have spent hours upon hours in a pew. I went to a private Christian high-school and then on to a Christian college, church camp every summer. (where I met my husband) So all in all I have never not known anything but a life in Christ. I am very thankful that I was brought up in such a way and know that it has made me what I am today...a wife and mother that is trying to live everyday for Christ, that is trying everyday to teach her children the love that Christ has for them and how they can share that love with others. And I hate to say this, and please hear me out before you make any judgements, ok here I go...I have a few friends that just came to know Christ as adults...and I am sometimes jealous of them. They have such a fire and a strong desire to be consumed with God and Christ. They have a stronger walk with him and a better understanding of Him. I use to think that well its just new to them and that they will get to the point I am at where they will start to take things for granted and it will become more of a routine then a relationship, just give them time. Boy, was I wrong!! They seem to be getting closer and closer and I seem to be struggling more and more. Then as I was praying and studying trying so hard to have what they have....I started blogging,(what a place for God to show me what I was missing) and what I saw through some of the bloggers was amazing to me ...that is where I started to see that it is OK to doubt, it is OK to wonder and it most definitely OK to show the world that you love God...and that it is not just talk , routine, or a list of rules...but that it is about a relationship and that without Him in your heart you have nothing. I want to Thank you all for the great examples and the great big mirror you have been to me so that I could take a honest, open, truthful look at myself and see what needs to change in my life and my heart!! I hope that this makes some sense to you...please realize I do not have the gift of words..that sometimes I know what I want and feel but have a hard time expressing it with words!