So excited..so surprised...in awe really!!!!

This Christmas is now complete and as of an hour ago even the house is back to normal. The tree is taken down and thrown out by the curb, the presents are all put up in the kiddos room (now lets not get crazy here..they are not organized or anything just put in the kiddos room..hehe),and we are all ready for a fresh new start in 2011.

I have not made resolutions in years, but I have set some realistic goals this year. On top of that list is to get healthier, *not lose weight ...that will just be a bonus to eat healthy and exercise more. (my parents got the whole family a trip to Disney World in May and I want to be alot healthier before the trip)

Also one of my goals is to do better with the blogging and video/picture taking of my fast growing children. I would also like to do more speaking and teaching, and writing about God and how he has worked and is continuing to work in my life. We all have stories but I have been told repeatedly that I should write a book so I think that maybe I should share my story, so that is one of my goals this year.

This year I had two things on my list..a flip camera and a Rebel Cannon camera. Well I got the flip and was over the moon not really expecting to get the other one, well last night Warren's parents surprised us all and gave us all one!! to say I was shocked, surprised and down right in awe would be a understatement!!!!

Christmas is over...

For most of the world Christmas is done...we at the Robinson's however have one more Christmas to go..tomorrow we will go to Nanny and D's (aka Warren's parents..) and celebrate Christmas with his brother and sister and their families..a total of 7 children! Fun times and lots of noise..we are having breakfast for dinner, so I am making chocolate chip pancakes, strawberry pancakes, and blueberry pancakes...yummy makes my stomach growl thinking about it! I am still working on one of the presents for them..fingers crossed I can get it all done!! We had a great Christmas morning..minus one minor thing. Have I ever mentioned before how great my kiddos are?? Well if I haven't then let me tell you I have the greatest kiddos ever!! FYI..if you think that doing the whole Santa thing is lying to your child and is going to mess them up in some way then I suggest you quit reading...we believe in our house about Santa and we want our children to enjoy the magical, fantasy for as long as possible..to not lose that part of being an innocent child...but that is just us. Emily Klair got the "Tangled" tower doll house that she wanted so bad. Well, Santa (let me tell you Santa looked all over for it..) could not find the doll and horse that went with it..but could only find Flynn Ryder...so on Christmas morning as she is looking for her doll to start playing with the great new dollhouse..we inform her that the doll must have fallen off the sleigh (or off the face of the planet haha..bc seriously it was no where to be found!!) and that one day soon she would find it magically here at the house...she picked up Flynn and started playing...no fussing, no sad face, no crying, no whining!! She was so excited to get the tower and play with it that she didn't even care about the doll not being there..again I say, I have some pretty great kiddos!! I hope that everyone had a great Christmas and guess what I got my flip camera I have been asking for...whoo hoo so here is a short video I did yesterday morning..excuse the mess and the yawning did I mention we have been very busy around here and we are all worn out!!

Ready or not here it comes...

Well I am no where ready for Christmas!! NO WHERE READY!! I haven't finished my shopping ,don't know what I am making for all the Christmas dinners I am attending....nothing is wrapped..but yet it is only two days away!! I have no motivation and while I look forward to spending time with my family I do not look forward to all the gift wrapping, cooking, and feeling rushed. But READY OR NOT HERE IT COMES.... so Merry Christmas to you all!!! and hopefully the next blog post will be filled with new pics from my new camera..whether it be a still camera or a flip...I have fingers crossed for both!!!

In sickness and in health...

Mine and War's anniversary is just around the corner. December 28th to be exact!!

I am not sure what I was thinking when we set our date in Dec. ?? Crazy times were had the year we got married let me tell you.

I got to thinking the other day that Warren and I have been together for 18 yrs!! We dated since we were 15 got married at 19...and will celebrate 14 yrs of marriage this yr. Wow 18 yrs, it has went by so fast and yet at times it seems like we have been together forever.

Warren and I have faced many things that people our age has never even thought about. I knew I was going to spend the rest of my life with him, and completely understood what marriage was all about, that there was no turning back once we said "I do" that was it. Sure there are circumstances that could or would make things change our situation but for all intense purposes we said "I do" for forever! I was proud to walk down that aisle and take those vows, I said them all and meant everyone from the bottom of my heart.

Did I understand them fully? Did I know what I was saying?? Was I so happy to finally be Mrs. Warren Robinson, that I would of said anything? Was I just into the wedding planning??

Yes and no to all of the above. HMMM? you ask??

OK when I was 19 my life was all about me, all about my dreams and I knew my life would be prefect I just knew it would be. I mean why not?? I was a good girl, and had a great man I was in love with and going to spend the rest of my life with. He had big plans, and together we were going to have a great life.

Now don't get me wrong this post is not about how horrible my life is our how hard things are in fact this post is not negative at all..so just bear with me please!

I did mean my vows with every part of my heart, BUT I didn't fully understand them. Not until life happens and you actually don't have the perfect little life you always dream of do you know what you were saying with those vows.

After 14 yrs of marriage and a little, ok let me be completely honest here ALOT OF "life" thrown at us, some of it good and some of it hard, some if it sad and some of it happy, I can finally say that I not only said :

FOR BETTER OR FOR WORSE

IN SICKNESS IN HEALTH

FOR RICHER OR POORER

TILL DEATH DO US PART

But I MEANT them and now fully UNDERSTAND them!!!

I am proud to be MRS. WARREN ROBINSON and even though we have had LOTS OF LIFE we have also had LOTS OF LOVE and I wouldn't trade it for anything and I am just as much in love as the day we got married!!!

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

Today is my little sisters BIRTHDAY~~ So Happy Birthday Andrea...I hope you have a great day! I hope you know how much I look up to you and am proud that you are my sister. You are a great mom, and you are a great teacher, great friend, wonderful aunt, and a excellent Christian example to all that know you!! You are brave and strong in ways I could never be..Thank you for all you do YOU are appreciated and loved more then you know!!!

Off the map...

I moved around a lot while I was younger. I hated and loved it all at the same time. Sometimes I get the moving bug, and I have it right now. I want to get out of town and not just for a vacay! I would love to live in the mountains, the beach, a big city, anywhere else.... I would love to pick my family of four up and just leave, go anywhere, as long as it is far far away. It is not like I don't like it here in Tn, it is not because I want to leave my big family, it is not because I don't have a wonderful life here. Because I DO have a wonderful life, I love having my kiddos have their grandparents down the road, I love that my hubby works 5 min from the house, I love my church family, I love that I coach at the same high school I graduated from, I love all my friends, I really do love where I live... BUT SOME DAYS I WOULD LOVE TO BE OFF THE MAP! Just to get away and get a new set of friends, get a new house, new school, new job, new church family. What if we did it, just up and left?? Would we be sorry? Would we regret it? Would we be grateful for the life we once had?? Who knows? When we moved from MI to TN when I was 13 I hated it!! I hated this town, the new school, the new "friends" or lack there of, hated the new church...but in the end it was the best thing my parents did, I honestly believe I would be a totally different person with a totally different life. So see sometimes getting OFF THE MAP and away from what you know and are comfortable with can be a blessing and I sometimes feel like we the Robinson's may be missing out on something new and exciting in a different town, in a different state..hmm? just some thoughts I have been really thinking about lately.

oh how sweet he has your nose..

When my little man was born he was beautiful!! He had brown eyes and dark hair and the most perfect little face and well he is still a beautiful boy!! I know I know boys are suppose to be handsome not beautiful but sorry my boy is beautiful!

Anywho why I am blogging today??Tyler is me made over, he acts like me, talks like me, has my nose, and unfortunately he has my migraines. I wish I could take it away for him, as someone that suffers with them it really breaks my heart to see him suffer so. Today, he got sent home from school because he let it go to long before he told someone and ended up getting sick with it. I hate that he suffered most of the day at school. He is very stubborn (my hubby says he also gets this from me..but I beg to differ!) and responsible too and wanted to make it all day so he wouldn't miss any homework or anything, bless him!

Heredity is a great thing when it comes to noses, and eyes and such but sometimes it can really stink...Here is to hoping my Tyman gets to feeling better soon!!!

to worry or not to worry??

(gotta love this precious face...EK playing with my camera, have I mentioned how much I miss this camera?? ) For those of you that know me you know that I tend to be a worrier. Big shocker, I know right! I worry about what people think of me and my family, I worry about the kiddos and their health issues, I worry about Warren, my parents, brothers and sisters, my in-laws...what can I say I worry!! Emily Klair is doing really well on her new seizure meds, and hasn't had a seizure that we know of in a while. I am soo thankful for this and praise God everyday that she goes seizure free. These last few weeks I have started to notice somethings that are worrying me about EK. Now mind you school hasn't said anything to me yet, but if she is this way at school I am sure to get that call soon. She has been forgetful...I know what you are thinking, isn't she only 7 almost 8 next week..wow that soon I can't believe that..sorry got off track back to what you were saying isn't she only 7 aren't all kids forgetful??yes she is only 7 and kids are suppose to be forgetful, but this is different. She is doing something and literally 5 minutes later having no idea she did it, or said it, and it isn't every time or even everyday. But when it does happen it happens numerous times, like forgetting if she took her meds, or forgetting what she wore all day even though she took it off and changed clothes not 15 mins earlier, doing her homework but having no idea she already finished it...going shopping and not remembering the color dress she picked out and bought?? There are many more examples but these are just a few... So right now I am debating googling because my fear is that this is a type of seizure...or even worse a side affect from one of the meds..and the last thing I want is to start messing with her meds again! So right now I am in the middle of the all the time ever present thought process of is this something I need to worry or not worry about....

Nice or Naughty list??

There are many words that people could use to describe me...or ahem excuse me have used to describe me. Lets see there are the words that are perfectly true, like mother, wife, sister, daughter, friend, coach, teacher,Christian...there are those words I hope are truly true such as friendly, funny, smart, pretty, sweetheart, but then what about the words I know are true but don't like about myself like fat, grouchy, smart mouthed, loud ...so on and so forth.

I always say every year that I would really like to change my eating habits, get healthier, exercise more..blah blah same song different verse...Here lately all and I mean ALL of my friends have become runners, and not just get up in the morning runners but full marathon runners...I admire them so much. I have tried and tried and I am not a runner!! I do like to work out and love to be active...but have not done enough or kept it constant enough to do any good.

I have always been the big girl in the room, and have blogged about this before, but since this surgery has thrown me for such a loop I am ready to be doing something, ANYTHING active right now.

I am not a couch parent, I play with my kiddos and keep them very active which in turn means I am active but would like to be much more in shape!!! not too mention much more attractive and skinny... so I have asked for a bike for Christmas that is one of my kiddos favorite things in the world so I am hoping to get one and be able to start riding and get in better shape and maybe even lose some weight. So I figure if I blog about it and post pics then maybe I have a better shot at keeping up with it this year.

But first I have to get a bike...fingers crossed I have been good enough this year to find my name on the nice list and not the naughty list!!

(the picture at the top is of some of my amazing teens from church and my sil..I am the biggest one in the picture...it is the only picture I could find of myself that showed my whole body...so it will be my beginning pic)

Two weeks and counting..

Well it has been two weeks now from my shoulder surgery and each day gets better and better. I have not even started Christmas shopping yet, or putting up Christmas decorations around the house. So right now we at the Robinson house look like a bunch of Grinch's... We had a great Thanksgiving, we spent it with friends and family. I did not make it to Warren's grandmothers because of the surgery but he and the kiddos went and had a great time. I did get to go down the road to my mom's house and they joined me there later in the day. So tech. we did not get to eat Thanksgiving dinner together but we still got to spend some great quality time together, playing games, being silly, and just overall enjoying one anothers company. Wish I had some photos to share but still haven't replaced the camera that was stolen. Hoping to get one for Christmas. Next week Tyler is marching in the Christmas parade here in town with the jump rope team, and then doing a program for the PTA..EK will also be singing in the program. Maybe we can borrow a camera so I can post some pics of the fun events!! Hoping to get in the Christmas spirit this weekend, and get the house and tree all decorated!!

not fun not fun at all...

well I have been down for a week..had shoulder surgery and let me just say I am miserable!! I have had lots of surgeries, and none let me say that again...NONE have ever hurt like this. I can not get comfortable no matter what I try. I am waiting for this each day gets better and better thing to kick in because right now I am in misery!! So today I am thankful for strong pain medicines...because this shoulder surgery stuff is not fun not fun at all!!!!

Lots to be Thankful for...

Thankful for lots of fun family memories....

roof over our heads....

Well I missed a day yesterday so this post is gonna have two things I am thankful for in it. The first thing I am thankful for is my church family. I have been blessed to be at the same church since I was a teenager. While awhile at college I found a church home there but it was never the same. When Warren and I moved back to Columbia we knew right away where we would be going to church. It is truly a blessing to have such wonderful brothers and sisters in Christ to worship with. Today was give away day and while I type this my eyes are wanting to close, I am exhausted. We saw right around 550 people today. It is such a reminder at how blessed we truly are. So tonight I am thankful for my home. Small as it may be and not decorated with the finest things, and there are things that need to be fixed, it is a home. It is full of love, laughter, tears, joy,and fun. It keeps us cool in the hot southern summers, warm in the winter, and dry from the rain. I am thankful for the roof over our heads that we had made our home.

Pre-K is the place to be...

Today I am thankful for my job... I have the best job in all the world..I work two days a week and I am on the same school schedule as my children...we we get all breaks and holidays off together. I am extremely thankful for my job... There are days that I miss my salon and really miss all things hair but for the most part I have the best of both worlds, that makes it all worth it. I mean who else get to play, be silly with, make fun crafts, and cuddle with some of the greatest kids in the world and still get paid for it?? Let me tell you pre-K is the place to be....

Friendship...

Today I am very thankful for my friends...some of which are very much like family so I guess in away this is still a "thankful for family" post...

Through out the years I have had many friends, and over the years my definition of friends have changed quite a bit.

I have friends young and old. I have some friends that are "our" friends meaning couple friends that Warren and I both get along with, go on family dates with, family vacays with, and enjoy spending time with. I have my fun loving group of girls that I go on a summer beach trip with each year that you can read about in my old post called Friends...I think it is in the July 2008 post, then the post right after that has pics of those I talk about in that post(if you have a min take a look at it, it sums up how much I love those girls) . I have friends that I have had since childhood. I have friends that have become friends because we have kids the same age and are going through the same challenges and facing the same struggles. I am a people person, I love to talk to, hang out with, be silly with and overall just like being with people...I have a lot of friends and everyone of them are different in so many ways as is our relationships...I love my friends and are very Thankful for each and everyone of them!!!

FaMiLy....3

So I have been looking through my photos today trying to find some good ones for this post...and it is sad...I have some great pictures don't get me wrong but it is sad because they are all from last fall,winter, and spring...since our camera was stolen a few wks ago along with everything in my purse..(trust me it was quite the ordeal) we have nothing from this summer..no family vacay pics, no first vball camp pics, nothing of us being silly and having fun in the pool...nothing nada..oh well what are you going to do??? "Thankful for my family" Today I am thankful for all my sisters and brothers...mine and Warren's! We may not always see eye to eye but in the end we love and laugh .....do not know where I would be without them!!! I Love all of them... Andrea & Jamie, Krysi, Jesi, Matthew, Christopher & Marsha, Stephanie & Shawn....

FaMiLy..2

Warren and I have a huge family...I am the oldest of 5 and Warren is the baby of 3!

Today i am "thankful for my family"..this post is about my in-laws.

They too were high school sweethearts, they were great parents to Warren. They taught him how to be loving, kind, and a wonderful husband and father. They are great Grandparents to our children (aka nanny and D),they come to almost all of the kiddos games and special programs. They have a strong faith and have passed that on to their children. They have led by example when it comes to putting family first.

Today I am thankful for my in-laws....without them I wouldn't have the hubby I have today!

ps...I have no pictures of my father in law bc he is always taking them...so this is the best I got right now.....just another reason I am thankful for him...he is a great photographer and keeps us all up to date with great photo memories!!!

FaMiLy..

So I am about an hour and half away from not having a post today..not because I haven't thought about it or because I was not sure what I was Thankful for...but because I was trying to decide how I wanted to do this..lump them all together or take them one at a time, so I have decided I am going to do both....That's right it is my blog so I can do what I want right???

So the first of "thankful for my family" is going to be a post about my parents....

My parents were high school sweethearts..they also married when they were young...they have always showed love and kindness for me and for everyone they know. They have opened their hearts and their home for more then one child..three to be exact. They sacrificed a lot to send me to a private Christian high school and college. They were always and still are always there for me...they took me church taught me about God and Jesus..taught me right from wrong. I never wanted for anything...they were great parents!!! Words can not express how much I love and admire them...

Now they are wonderful grandparents (aka Granny and Pa)to my kiddos.

ps..the pic is from last winter..we never get snow but we had a great big snow last winter and we had a great weekend of fun playing and being silly in the snow...I know you can't really see them but this is one of my favorites..because it's them...playful and loving!!!

I AM THANKFUL FOR MY PARENTS.....

Sissy Sue.....

Emily Klair...EK

beautiful, sweet, 2nd grader, gymnastics gal, great reader, softball player, soccer player, sister, daughter, friend, content with any situation, living and handling a seizure disorder, toothless, swimmer, four wheel rider, loves to climb anything...a true monkey, fearless, very tough chic....and much much more...

I love my sissy sue...and I am very thankful for the wonderful gift of Emily Klair!!!!! There really is no one like you....

Little man.....

Tyler Neil....

Sports playing, kind hearted, adorable, 4th grader, smart, president of student council, brother, friend, speech maker, Bible reader, song leader, silly, video game playing, person living with spina bifda occulta, MIRACLE and much much more.....

Today I am thankful for my little man... I love you Tyler.....you will always be my little man....

"I DO....."

Today I am thankful for those two little words "I Do"... My husband and I met when we were 15 yrs old, at church camp. We became fast friends and had a blast that whole week. After we got back from camp he was baptized and I called to congratulate him, that phone call lasted for over 2 hrs.... That was the beginning of some really great memories. Warren and I have been through alot, we got married at 19 yrs old, he was a sophomore at Harding University in Arkansas, and I was in beauty school in the same college town. We were broke, at that time he went to school and worked part time at a small department store,while I also went to school but I worked full time as a waitress during the week and at a popular ice cream parlor on weekends. It was a mad house, we hardly ever saw each other but when we did it was great....I loved that first year!! I was wore out but I loved it, most people say your first year is your hardest of marriage but for us it was one of the best. We have always been the best of friends, now don't get me wrong even best friends fight, get on each others nerves and overall just don't get along sometimes, and we have had our fair share of fights and such. But you see here is where our relationship vary from some...we are in it for the long haul...we understand that there will be rough patches, highs and lows, we know that a good marriage is one that is worked on consistently, and we really do work on it...we are not perfect, we are not pretending to be something we are not. I love my husband and today that is what I am thankful for....two little words that make me his and him mine...."I DO".....

Give-away day..

well it's just around the corner..and I have to say that I love this day because it is a fun family day for us....Tyler helps, EK helps, Warren and I help, and we have a great time being with our church family. This time of year always makes me think of how blessed we truly are, how much we really have and how much we take for granted. I am thankful for many things...and many people are using their Facebook status to say something they are thankful for everyday for the whole month of November...so instead of FB I am going to do a post (ok try to do a post everyday lets be honest here....)everyday saying what I am thankful for. This weekend was my annual retreat with the teens at church to Guntersville...and our theme was "Identity" and we had some really great lessons...so here is what I am thankful for today: I am thankful for Jesus who died on the cross for me and my sins...I am thankful that I can now change my name to "forgiven".

The happenings of a very busy family....

I have not posted in a while and there really are no excuses...although we have been one busy family! I started my volleyball season the 2nd week in July, and have just finished it. We had a great season finishing as District Champs again this year and 3rd overall in Regions! I am very proud of all my girls and will miss our 7 seniors greatly next year!! Tyler took a break this fall from soccer..gasp, I know right?..to play football and he really liked it. He was the... wait for it wait for it...KICKER! and he did a wonderful job! He also got some time in as tail back, and tight end, and running back I believe..I know he kicked the ball, ran the ball and did some great blocking!!! He learned alot and had a great time with it. His team just won the Championship this Saturday 33-6!!! He is on the jump rope team again this year at school and is loving that also. He is a busy guy right now he was just voted president of the student council at his school, he is on the safety patrol, and has already started his song leading, and Bible reading lessons at church. He is a great little boy and he amazes me everyday... Emily Klair is loving gymnastics, she is learning to do cartwheels, hand stands, and has started work on front hand springs. She loves the balance beam (makes me a nervous wreck) and is making progress on the bars..she is quite the little monkey!! She did volleyball camp with me this summer and she did rather well for a 7 year old. She loves to read and has her nose in a book all the time!! She is still quite the drama queen (again still not sure where she gets that from)and is actually very funny...she is going to be doing puppets this year at lads to leaders. Her seizures are under control right now, she has been on two different medicines for the last few months and it seems to be the right meds for her. WE are very thankful everyday that goes by that she has not had a seizure!!! She is beautiful and kind and the most loving little girl I have ever met... Warren has been busy at work, but he is still the best dad in the whole world. I am thankful to have a great husband like him. I am looking forward to this time of year because for us it is the time we slow down and do not have soo much going on. I hope we can take some time for ourselves and go out on some dates...sometimes I miss having him all to myself!

Picture updates!!

These last few weeks have been a whirlwind...from church camp, to the birth of my new precious nephew, to just getting into a new summer routine.

I have really enjoyed getting to spend some fun time with my nieces during these past two weeks...

They are both sweethearts and cute as all get out!! here are some of the pictures I took of us playing and having a great time in the sun at Granny's house in her pool....

Prayers...

My family is no stranger to the power of prayer. From the first time I really realized how prayer works when I was 13 and my lil brother was so sick and needed a surgery that had never been performed before to the birth of my son and then with EK and her seizures, to the birth of my beautiful nieces...to this last year and the journey we all went on with my dad. Prayer works and right now I am praying hard that this surgery goes well with my sweet nephew today. I am praying that God gives Jamie and Andrea peace that only he can. I am praying for the girls who are doing great but who do miss their mommy and daddy. I am praying for all of us to give them the love and support so that they don't even realize how long it has been since they have been at home and on some sort of routine.Yesterday was a fun day for the girls we went swimming and had a fun day in the sun...they are both sweethearts and I love them like crazy!! Today I would like for all that read this to join me in prayers on behalf of the Spears family...esp for Baby Anderson and his surgery today!! I have some great pictures to post of yesterday....so fingers crossed I can get them up and on here sometime today!

butterflies and bullfrogs....

My children differ in more ways then just their gender.

Tyler doesn't like chocolate candy...Emily Klair loves it!!

Tyler loves sports...Emily Klair enjoys them but could live without them!!

Tyler is soo not a dare-devil...Emily Klair seems to have no fear!!

Tyler is very independent....Emily Klair not so much..she needs us much more!!

Tyler school comes very easy to him....Emily Klair not so much!!

The list could go on and on!!

Even though for the most part they are as different as butterflies and bullfrogs..they are still my beautiful, tenderhearted, sweet, kind, loving, best kiddos in the world and I am soo proud of them!!

*another difference..Tyler wants his hair longer and EK keeps going shorter....I will have to get more updated pics on here...EK's hair is above her shoulders now and Ty 's is still long but did get a good haircut we can now see his ears again..but for the most part it is still long...again different in soo many ways!!

remember when 4...

As we walked into the NICU, I saw a nurse walking around carrying a baby, she was in the very back of the room. I turned to Warren and said there is my baby, he replied with no that is not Tyler that baby has an IV in his head and Tyler's was in his foot yesterday. I then replied with I don't care about that I know that is my baby, and it was. I had only held him for about 5 minutes 3 days ago and it was not perfect and it was certainly not what I had imagined and dreamed of but it was more then enough time to immediately know my child from across a room full of babies...I don't even try to explain it, I don't even try to take credit for it all I know is I knew that was Tyler and nothing was going to stop me from being there with him for anything and everything from here on out! I could not get to him fast enough!!! So all week long I had heard my whole family talk about how nice the nurses were how sweet the staff in the NICU was, how great they had been about leaving them alone and just letting them sit and rock and hold Tyler. Well, I get to the nurse holding my baby and she is nice and offers me my child, I go to sit down and rock him, and that is when she starts, she proceeds to tell me how to check his temperature, how to feed him, tells me I must show her I can change a diaper, on and on she went. I know I was looking at her like she had three heads, I mean really lady leave me alone let me get to know my baby. Finally Warren nicely tells her we have time for all of this but that I had not gotten to see him or be with him more then 5 minutes and she finally leaves us alone. I lost it, I looked around the room and saw some very tiny very sick babies, and it broke my heart. I couldn't stop crying, I couldn't pull it together. Soon after my break down they came to get him for his big test and we were banished to the waiting room. The wait was unbearable, I remember sitting there not talking and not joining in on the conversations, just staring or crying, I am sure people thought I was crazy...what can I say I was! I went into the hallway at one time to get some air and move around a little and another mother of a baby in the NICU came up to me, hugged me and told me that her baby had been in there for 5 weeks and it never got any easier to see them all hooked up to tubes and monitors and to hang in there, we also talked about other things that I will keep just between us. It was the sweetest kindest thing and exactly what I needed at the time. Finally someone who understood what I was going through. You see I hadn't told anyone that I was feeling ashamed, guilty, and selfish, I hated my baby being there but I hated even more that I had not had a perfect baby. I know now that it was ok to kinda go through a mourning period and feel all of these emotions but then I just thought of myself as a horrible human being. The time came for the Dr. to tell us what the test had shown and it was great news, he did not need a shunt, he was still moving his arms and legs, and other then missing his L3 and L4 vertebrae, having a small "track" of fibrous tissue that would have to be removed around 8 months old, he had a great chance at a very normal life. On top of that great news he was free to go home with me that day!! He still struggles with things from his spina bidifa occulta, like leg cramps, and having too tight of muscles, having scoliosis, and there is still a very small chance that his piece of "track" that the Dr. couldn't get to in his surgery could get caught on his missing vertebrae and tether his spinal cord paralyzing him, but we know that he is headed for great things.....his story is still unfolding...

remember when 3...

I was sitting in the bed waiting on the Dr. to make rounds the next morning. I was alone, mom had left she had to go to work that day, and I was ready to leave. The Dr. walked in and told me that I could not go. I was devastated, he told me I was in bad shape myself and needed to be monitored here at the hospital. After he left, a nurse came in (pretty much right after he left) and gave me some medicine...lets just say they kept me really drugged up for that whole day. I thank the Dr. for that now..because the next 2 days were hard enough waiting around and wondering about my baby.. Tyler had test after test run, they had put him to sleep a couple times to test him, Warren was with him as much as he could be. Warren got to feed him first, got to change his diapers, got to just sit and rock him, bond with him. On top of every other emotion I had I was jealous, I felt forgotten, I felt disconnected to my husband and to my baby. I did not know everything that was going on and did not know how the NICU was run, I did not realize that Warren and those that were there could only be in the room with Tyler a certain amount of time, and that they had to sit in a waiting room just waiting for the next time to get to see him. I think it was the second day he was in the NICU he was scheduled for a test that day, where they had to put him to sleep, and I was soo unconnected with what was going on, I called Warren that morning on his cell phone, wanting to know how it was going and what the Dr.'s were saying. That would have been fine if it had been 10:00 am, but it was 6:00 am and Warren was still in bed, he was exhausted, taking care of the stuff at Vandy with Tyler then stopping by to see me and let me know how the day had went. He was running on empty to say the least. Him still being in bed and not getting ready to get to the hospital made me furious, I was crazy, I did not understand how he could not be ready already and on his way there...in my defense, I was out of touch with what it was like for him, I was jealous, I was mad at the world, and really I just was hormonal and crazy with the what if's! Finally, the day came that the "BIG" test was going to be performed, they were going to see if he needed a shunt put into his head for spinal fluid build up, I was determined to be at the hospital with him for that. So that morning I was up showered and dressed waiting on the Dr. to make his rounds and informed him I would be discharged that morning so I could be there for my son. Boy I must have been very convincing because he let me go....(convincing or pitiful?? I like to think convincing) Warren came and we were going to go to Vandy together. First off I wanted to get to the hospital to see my baby, what I did not think about was how just being discharged would affect me. They bring the wheelchair into the room and Warren left to pull the car around, as I am being wheeled down the hall, it hit me, I had no baby in my arms, nothing but my bag. To say I lost it is a complete understatement...the poor girl wheeling me out didn't know what to do, or say, looking back I feel more sorry for her..she had to put up with me..hahaha! So off to Vandy we went....That was one of the longest hours of my life, we get to the hospital and it was like I was walking in slow motion, the elevators were conspiring against me I know they were, and then we get to the NICU. I was not quite prepared for it. Warren showed me how to use the phone in the hall to call and ask if we could come in and see Tyler, then get a gown on and then how to wash our hands and then ask again to be allowed in. This last day of our story is a good one so I am going to end it here...with me walking into the NICU for the first time and seeing my son for the first time in 3 days....

jump rope video..

ok so my video is not cooperating so if you click on this http://bamaboog.blogspot.com that should take you to one of our friends and Tyler's good friend Dawson's mom's blog..whew that was a mouth full I know..anywho friends of ours that got some good highlights of all the performances...Tyler is in some if it...bouncy hair...hope you enjoy!! it is quite fun to watch them..they are pretty talented at this jumping rope stuff!!

remember when 2.....

Lets see where did I leave off, oh yeah I was just getting back from the operating room and the nurses were there..one was checking my temperature, one was readjusting my blood pressure cuff, and two were in the corner of the room talking to each other..I couldn't clearly hear what they were saying but I knew it was about me,and my baby. I asked where is my baby and husband, and they replied "you are going to be just fine, you did great back there."...hmm thank you very much but I asked about my baby not me??? I was about to say this outloud when Warren walked in...lets just say if he had let off a stink bomb those nurses would not have left any faster, closing the door behind them. At this point I must back up and tell you about something that happened on the way to the hospital that morning...I took Warren's hand in the car and said in a very serious tone " If you have to choose me or the baby..pick the baby...if it is life and death, or something like leaving me because he has to be taken somewhere, whatever it is choose the baby, I will be fine." not sure why I did it we were not expecting there to be a problem, but I said it and I meant it!!! Warren walks over to my bed and holds my hand, ask me how I am doing, and then proceeds to tell me that Tyler has a small hole in his back and that they are wanting to transfer him to the NICU at Vanderbilt, by ambulance, he says that he may never walk, he may not have the use of anything from the neck down, but that right now he is moving away in the nursery because they have him all wrapped in gauze (he didn't like it all over him), because some spina bidifa babies are allergic to latex..and they need to cover the hole up in case it is leaking spinal fluid. He then went on to tell me about some of the test and things that were going to be happening when the pediatrician came in,followed by my doctor. I can honestly say that I do not remember much about what they said...and I have a couple theories on that....one I was soo drugged up, I could barely keep my eyes open, two the first thing they said was just because he is moving his arm and legs now does not mean that he will continue to...at that point all I remember is squeezing Warrens hand and crying uncontrollably,and closing my eyes. I still had not held him yet, I still had not even touched him yet. I wanted my baby, I was exhausted, wore out, and in pain...and I wanted my baby! I was moved to a regular room and was told that the ambulance was there to get him, I still had not held him. I asked to hold him, to see him, to smell him, to love on him. I kept getting the answer "in a minute he is still being checked out." They wheeled him into the room in the incubator that he was to travel to Vanderbilt in and they placed him in my arms...and I was over come with emotions. I cried, and cried, I tried to look at him, soak him in, love him, I wanted to see him move, I wanted to see those big brown (his eyes were never blue..he came out with the prettiest brown eyes ever!) eyes that had looked at me over that curtain, but all I could do was cry and say over and over I am sorry I did this too you, I am sorry I did this too you, I am sorry I did this too you, over and over. I got to hold him..umm all of about 5 minutes with everyone looking at and watching me including the ambulance drivers..still wish I had sent everyone out of the room and had I been in a better less drugged state of mind I would have! Because the first moment I got to hold my son was not perfect, was no where close to perfect...it was rushed, sad, and not a tender moment like I had planned and desperately waited for. They took him from me, and left for a hospital an hour away. Warren's parents left and followed the ambulance up there, my dad left to take my siblings home because it was so late, my sister was driving Warren up to Vandy(she had taken a day off college..and had to be back at TN Tech early the next morning...remember this is after midnight by now)...my mom wanted to go with them...but I lost it when they took him and everyone left to watch him be put in the ambulance...and for the first time in a long time all I wanted was my mommy!!! So she stayed behind to help me, I don't think she will ever know how much that meant to me. I think that night I was awake more then asleep even though I was very drugged up, they kept giving me pain medicine but I was determined to get up and moving, because the faster I could get up the faster they would let me go so I could go be with my baby and be there during all those test, and in case he needed surgery, I just wanted to be with my baby. This is really a long story..and I hate to rush it, so I think I will close with me getting up and walking before I needed to, and sitting up waiting on my dr. to make rounds that next morning so I could beg him to let me go....

remember when.....

Tyler is doing speech for Lads 2 Leaders, and he has decided he wants to talk about his birth story. I told him that would be a great idea, the theme for this years convention is Faith is the Victory ...Hebrews. I am loving that he choose this topic because it has given me a real opportunity to "remember when" that day was such a blur to me, and in all honesty I do not think that I let myself remember everything about that day. Since working on this speech I feel all the emotions of that day just like it happened yesterday. So I thought I would blog about that day, if for nothing else just to help me "remember when"... First off, Tyler was such a blessing in more ways then you can even imagine. After losing 3 babies in one year, we were told we probably could not have children of our own. I was devastated all I have ever wanted is to be a mother...my senior prophecy in high school was that I would be a mother of 8 children!! can you imagine 8??? haha...shhh don't tell anyone but I so would love to have more... So needless to say that finding out we were pregnant with Tyler was not exactly a good thing..I knew I could never carry a baby to full term, I was angry,scared, and really confused on why God would allow me to go through another heartbreaking loss. As the pregnancy progressed it became a real possibility that Warren and I were going to be parents...we were thrilled, scared to death but THRILLED beyond measure. So the day finally came that he was to be born..January 16 I was to be induced... We were told to be at the hospital by 6 am..we arrive and get all checked in, we were all settled in and ready to get the show on the road. By noon I was in pain, ready for my epidural, but everything was going as planned. Family and friends were there and (after the epidural :) ) it was like having a party. Well, by 9 that night I had not progressed as the dr. would of liked, so they told me that Tyler was turned face up and as he came down he turned his head...he was stuck ...so he suggested a c-section...I begged him please no...so he told me the nurses would turn me from side to side for 15 minutes and he would come back to see where we were...well that went on for another 45 minutes until he finally told me..its time to have this baby. By this time I was exhausted!! and just ready to have my Tyler..so off to the operating room we went..I must put a WARNING on this next part..not that I plan on getting graphic but this is the part of the story where it begins to get intense...and did not go near as we had planned!!! I started having a hard time breathing almost immediately after they upped my epidural, it was scary...but I tried to stay as calm as I could. They finally bring Warren into the room and he sat by my head, he was great,he kept me calm. The dr. pinches my stomach and I just about jump off the table..I felt it?? wait I have an epidural how did I feel it?? well, they are not sure but they tell me hang in there let them get the baby out and they will give me something as soon as the baby is out. What?? you mean I am going to feel this?? YES...I felt it all...cold tools, everything..Warren is the only reason i stayed as calm as I did....he was my rock!! I remember praying with him..I remember him telling me it is almost over...that I was doing great..him rubbing my hair and face telling me to breathe and to know if he could do it for me he would. Now this is the part of the story that him and I defer on...haha I know right! I remember them showing me Tyler over the curtain..and my first thought was he looked like my papaw that had passed away...and it made me smile...then I was asleep..they gave me some good stuff!! oh the relief I can not even explain. Warren watched them clean him up and hand him over to him..he says he walked to me and that I talked to him and Tyler...I don't remember that part, in fact I don't remember anything till I am back in a room, and Warren walks in WITHOUT Tyler!! I know this post is long and if you are still reading..thank you..I am not going to finish the story today but I will leave you with the intro to Tyler's speech..remember this part has been told to me, I did not live this part you see I was still out cold in the operating room... The dad beamed with pride as he carried his new born son out of the operating room and into the hallway to meet his family for the first time. After grandparents, aunts and uncles got a good look at the little one and pictures had been taken the dad took the baby to the hospital nursery to get weighed and cleaned up the family looked through the nursery windows and watched the nurses start to clean the baby up and then they did something very strange they closed the shades on the window so that no one could see in. The family thought that was odd but did not really think much about it, until the Dr. came around the corner and asked to speak to the father. The dr. lead the father to a small room where he sat him down and told him that the baby was to be transferred by ambulance to the NICU at a bigger hospital about an hour down the road. The Dr. went on to say that the new baby had a small hole in his back and that he would need more testing done, the Dr. also said that they were afraid the baby had spina bifida and that he was going to paralyzed and in a wheel chair if not completely bed ridden. The father thought to himself how did this day that had started out so joyous and happy suddenly turn into a night full of questions and worries? Even though the young father was scared for his new baby, he was positive that his son would be ok, he knew that no matter what he loved his son, he had faith that everything would be ok, and he was very thankful to God for this blessing. to be continued....

Snow daze...a little bit of this and a little bit of that...

Well the kiddos are out of school again tomorrow. As of tomorrow we have used all of our snow days for this year. This is the most snow I have seen in one winter since we have lived in TN. It is beautiful and the kids are enjoying it. I have enjoyed it but must admit that I am ready for spring...ready for warmer temperatures...sunny days....being able to have my windows open...everything that comes along with spring..even a good loud thunder storm...bring it on I am ready!!! EK has decided she is not going to play soccer or softball this spring she has decided she is going to try gymnastics!! so tomorrow is her first class...she is so excited!! She keeps reminding me that she needs to be there by 4:30!! She is sooo ready for class, I am excited to see how she likes it. Hopefully I will have pictures to post soon... Well we have had a very busy weekend and the guru did not have time to look at the jump rope video (hopefully this week)...we have been helping my sister and her husband paint and pull off boarder in their new house...they have painted every room in the new house...it was a big job but I must admit it looks really good!! I am having a blast and lots of fun with the kiddos during these snow days but I am beginning to feel a little snow dazed!!!! Bring on the sun, and the warmth!!

Busy Jumping Rope....among other things!!!

Tyler is on the jump rope team at his school. All year long they have been practicing on Tuesday and Thursday 45 min before school starts. I have never once had to get him up and moving on Tuesdays or Thursdays..he hops right out of bed and is ready to go. He loves the coach Mrs. Bailey and he enjoys the whole team. These last few weeks he has been really busy with the jump rope team, he has performed at two different high schools during halftime of the boys basketball games, he has done a PTA performance at his school, and even got out of school to go perform at 2 different elementary schools. He is wore out but totally loving it. WE love to watch him perform at anything he does...and right now he is a busy little guy. On top of this and regular school he is doing Bible reading at church, he is working on a speech (with a lot of help from mom) for Lads 2 Leaders, also for Lads 2 Leaders he is learning song leading, and he is on a puppet team. He is also playing basketball, and soccer is starting up soon!!

This is just one little snip-it of his team at the performance at Columbia Academy where I coach volleyball...it was not their best performance but it was the best crowd they have performed for yet..they were yelling and cheering for them and it was just a great atmosphere! He was very nervous about this performance because of knowing so many kids but he did well, and had a great time! By the way if you have a hard time finding him he is the kid with the bouncy hair..lol gotta love that hair!!

ok..I will have to get the computer guru to get the video to work..bc it worked before I published it but now it is not showing...so well I will have to get him right on that..bc it is a great little video...so stay tuned!!!

Who Knew???

So I was having a hard time sleeping last night so I thought I would get on my blog and read all my back post...it was really interesting to me. Let me explain what I mean...first off I had forgotten some of what I had wrote..especially when it came to stuff the kiddos had said or done. It was great going down memory lane. I realized last night that I have done a very poor job over the last year in keeping up with this blog and when I do post it is just an overview of what is really going on in our lives. After rereading post last night I realize that if no one ever reads or sees this blog again I don't care...but what I do care about is this... I loved the "scrapbook of post" and have decided that I am going to do a better job at blogging. Who knew???that rereading old post would kick my rear in gear to keep up the blogging....I think in a few years the kiddos will love to read it and see what all we did and how proud I am of them.

2010 a new year a new beginning.....

The Robinson's have been busy people for the last 6 months of the year.

I made it through another season of volleyball, this was my 5th season. We won our district this year and had a great season. The girls were great and I am one proud coach let me tell you!!

Warren finally got his truck!! Whoo hoo I am so proud for him. It is a black Nissan Titan, 4 door, leather seats, dvd player, heated seats, the works....it was well worth the wait. He is very happy with it and it does help that he got a great deal on it.

Tyler is enjoying school, although we are sad that his teacher has had to quit teaching mid year because of health issues. We will miss her, she was a great teacher. He is doing great in school, and is (to my unliking!!) very liked by the girls..our phone rings off the hook sometimes. He is in 3rd grade people..way to young for this to be starting!! I have let him grow his hair out and although I will not admit it to him, I do like the way it looks even though you can't see his beautiful brown eyes as much. He is playing basketball this winter instead of indoor soccer, we all decided it was time to try something different. He has already been talking about soccer sign ups though, that boy loves that sport!!

Emily Klair is doing great too! She is now on 2 different medicines to help control her seizures, we had a little bit of trouble with them this year but they are under control as of right now. We are just praying that it stays this way. She is not playing or doing anything right now, we have asked and tried to get her to do something girly, dance, gymnastics, tumbling, anything?? but she is content with nothing..so we are too. She says she is going to play softball again so who knows we may be on the softball fields again this spring.

My extended family has went through some major changes this last part of the year and we are all coming out from the darkness with a better understanding of what family is and what family means. 2010 it's a new year with a new beginning......